Kimestry

We Are All Healers

2010-10-19T13:38:00.000-07:00

"Why didn't they accept the payment?", the teller at the bank asked innocently. "It's a long story", I offered. This was the upset of the day that got me where I needed to be. I was getting "sick and tired" of being "sick and tired." So many things seemed to be going wrong in my life--I'd been sick for almost two weeks, finances didn't look that great, and my heart felt like it needed some major mending. It was a gloomy day so my first thought was to go home, make some tea, put on my pajamas and sleep. It was only 3 p.m.

Once I left the bank I decided that if there was ever a time to call upon spiritual tools, this was it. So instead of going home, I decided to go to the Marriott and check out a healer named Braco (pronounced Brautzo) that I had heard was doing a "gazing" every hour on the hour. A friend had informed me that his voice would also be heard during the final gazing; a rare treat since he hasn't spoken publicly for the past eight years.

I'd participated in a gazing session at my spiritual center the day before and noted that the people around me had varying reactions to the experience. The woman on my left sobbed the entire time, while the woman on my right seemed to be waiting for something profound to occur. "What next?" she asked aloud.

I'd experienced a profound sense of peace and calm. I somehow knew that we all have the power to heal with our gaze of love. The next day, however, the upset I experienced at the bank overshadowed that knowing. I felt that I needed to have as much or more positive input than the negative input I felt inundated with. I decided to hold the intention of a heart healing for myself and for several loved ones. I also intended to have a shift in the area of finances.

I parked my car on a residential street near the hotel and walked. It had stopped raining long enough for me to walk without my umbrella up. I descended to the ballroom level on the escalator. The first person I saw was a fairly famous actress. We're friends on Facebook, but I don't think she knew. She smiled anyway.

The next person I saw was someone I'd known for several years from church. She was in a wheelchair. Once I got my ticket for the gazing, I headed over to the line that was forming to enter the ballroom. The last person in line was a friend. She'd posted a comment on my Facebook page saying that she'd be there in the afternoon. I had no idea we'd be there at the same hour. She had brought a collage of photos of her loved ones which was pasted on a piece of cardboard.

As we talked, we shared our intentions for the gazing. Several other people we knew from church exited the ballroom as we were waiting; including the woman who'd told me about the gazing. I saw people that had been healing clients of mine. I also saw several people I'd seen the day before at the Conscious Life Expo. Seeing again that this spiritual community is so small, it reminded how we are all truly one.

During our conversation, my friend happened to lift the piece of cardboard with the photos of her loved ones to her chest. This gave me a glimpse of the back side of the cardboard. I saw the name of the company that the box she'd cut up had come from--Intuit. This was the name of the company that one of the loved ones I was praying for works with. I recognized instantly this amazing "God wink" and I knew that I was in the right place at the right time. Then my right hand began to vibrate.

This was a significant sign for me because I am an energy worker. The left hand typically represents the receiving hand and the right hand the giving hand. My right hand usually "heats up" when I'm either around someone who needs energy work or near someone or something that carries that high spiritual consciousness or vibration.

We soon entered the ballroom. After the welcome and some sweet flute music, a recording was played of Braco's voice. The message was in Croatian with no translation. The feeling tone was familiar, however. Later, in the parking lot, my friend and I would translate the message into English although we speak no Croatian.

Shortly after the message, Braco was introduced. He entered the ballroom, stood on a wooden platform on the makeshift stage, and gazed at the audience for the duration of one song. My crown and third eye chakra were activated. I felt heat in those areas. Then I began to see different images and became aware of certain experiences that I was going to have in the near future. I felt a resurgence of hope and a profound love for all; even the person I was praying for that I didn't even like. I noticed that more than anything, I thought about my loved ones and held the intention for their highest good to be done. I placed them in my heart, even the one I don't like, and held them there inundated with all the love I've ever felt---all the love that is. Finances took a back seat to this so much, that I hardly thought about it. I anticipated a major shift in my life, or perhaps my consciousness and I was excited to see how it would all manifest.

In the parking lot, my friend and I downloaded the message. "You are perfect, whole and complete. You are made in the image and likeness of God. Your highest good is done. All is well. And so IT IS."

Action Addiction

2010-07-06T18:53:00.000-07:00

"I'm sorry we didn't do anything exciting."

My friend's apology came after a leisurely day filled with time at her home with her husband and kids and a brief shopping excursion. I was visiting her for three days to keep her company as she had just had surgery. I told her that I was okay with relaxing and that she didn't need to entertain me with something "exciting".

Her apology made me think about how it seems that at times we all become addicted to entertainment, excitement, or DRAMA. If something isn't happening that's worthy of a Facebook post or even a "tall tale" to entertain friends with, we think life is boring. Or maybe that's just me or someone you know.

The truth that I know is that being given the opportunity to engage in life itself is amazing, exciting, and worthy of a Facebook post! To have the opportunity to live, breathe, and have our experiences in this body, in this now is more than worthy of celebration.

When I'm with my friends and family, I make it a practice to keep reminding myself to be fully present in the moment rather than allowing my mind to run down my "to do list" or think about what's next. This allows me to really appreciate the experience that I am having in the Now. There's NOTHING more exciting than that. Here's to Now!

Sit Your Behind Down!

2010-03-15T15:01:00.000-07:00

If you live outside of Southern California, you don't EVEN want to know what the weather is like today. You'd hate me. Eighty degrees in March! I took a walk by the beach today. I always learn something on my walks, but today I wasn't really looking for a lesson-I just wanted to take in some sunshine and ocean energy.

As I walked on The Strand in Manhattan Beach, I took in the ocean, the birds, the surfers, and all the children being pushed in strollers. And then there were the dogs. I noticed a woman walking a black and white dog. I noticed that the woman was going at a pretty good clip, walking in the opposite direction. All of the sudden, mid-stride, the dog lay down. Belly to cement, tongue hanging out, done. It was as if the dog suddenly said, "forget this mess. I'm taking a breather." The woman walking the dog quickly saw the futility of pulling the leash as it was clear that the dog wasn't going anywhere. This was an instance where I truly did LMAO.

What was the lesson? I realized that there are so many times in my life where I am going great guns and could use a break. The pressures of accomplishing things and checking things off my "to do list" are unavoidable. Or so it seems. The truth is that just like that dog, I can stop and take a breath. I can take some time to regroup before moving on. Even spiritual warriors need a break and taking a breather doesn't mean that I won't accomplish all my goals; it just means that I'll be refreshed and centered when I do.

After I laughed for what seemed an eternity, I sat down on a bench to look at the ocean. Like that little dog, I took a breather. I took in the sights and sounds around me. I looked at my hands which were red and slightly swollen from pumping my arms on my long walk. After a few moments of appreciation for my surroundings, I got up and completed my goal. I still made the distance, but I stopped to enjoy the journey and take in the view along the way.

Retreat to Advance-Joshua Tree Silent Meditation Retreat Chronicles Part II

2010-01-08T10:34:00.000-08:00

Day Two, Afternoon

The hardest part, for me, about being on a silent meditation retreat were meal times. Although seated across the table from someone I've always thought was sweet and really cute, I could not talk to him. Next to me was a friend that I adore and I had to avoid eye contact so that I would not be tempted to engage in conversation with her or giggle.

I thought to myself, "Why do I need to talk now? What would I say, anyway?" I imagined that to my friend I'd say, "I'm so honored to be on this journey with you." To the man across the table I'd say, "I've always thought you were such a sweetheart and we've never really had the chance to talk. How cool is it to be able to do that now."

Instead, I smiled at both and looked away quickly. I chuckled at myself for thinking that I need words in order to communicate when the energy I send out and receive is much more powerful. I chuckled because no one knew what I was thinking.

Retreat to Advance-Joshua Tree Silent Meditation Retreat Chronicles

2010-01-06T14:11:00.000-08:00

Day Two, Morning

When I woke up, my first words were, "Oh sh$@!" It was 7:14 am. I'd woken up at 6:15 am and had hit the proverbial snooze button with the intention of going to yoga class at 7:30 am. Up to that point, I'd been really good about being in the silence. I could only laugh at myself for breaking my serene silence with an expletive. Good thing my roommate wasn't there to witness it.

At yoga class I felt less flexible than I remembered myself being. I enjoyed focusing on my breath and I took it easy on myself, although it was a challenging class for me. My roommate had come to get me right before yoga, but I lost track of her after the class. I went to breakfast on my own.

After a day of meditation, I realized that I was having premonitions. What was interesting was that they would come to me as images during meditation. What was also interesting is that they were regarding something unexpected---food. That's right, every day in meditation I would see one of the foods we'd be eating at the next meal. The first time it was a bowl of raisins. I walked into the dining hall at breakfast and there they were next to the oatmeal. The second day it was blueberries (which accompanied the vegan dessert at dinner). Finally, the third day it was bananas. I wondered why premonitions about lottery numbers weren't forthcoming.

Later, I walked the labyrinth on the property. As I walked, I gave myself permission to experience miracles. I affirmed that I am peace. I knew that God always brings my desires or something better. And I gave thanks.

Surrendering Versus Giving Up

2009-12-21T15:14:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I had a thought concerning a relationship: I give up! This thought came out of a moment of frustration, hurt, and anger. Then I started to think about surrender. If I surrender this situation to the all good of God, is that the same thing as giving up? So I checked in with myself as to the energetic of the two statements: I give up! versus I surrender. Surrendering feels better. I had to ask myself, why is that?

Giving up comes from frustration. You've tried everything, nothing works, so why keep trying? The analogy I thought of was this. If I'm standing in an airplane with a parachute on and I don't take the risk and jump, that's giving up (or is that having sense? But I digress).

Surrendering comes from a different place emotionally. I'm standing in an airplane, I have a parachute on, and I fall effortlessly into the air knowing that I am held and sustained. Surrendering assumes that all will be taken care of. It is the realization that every situation that appears in life is guaranteed to reveal more goodness, more perfection, and more God. It is knowing that my highest good is achieved in EVERY circumstance; whether I like the outcome or not.

I choose to trust in God. I choose surrender. I surrender all. It just feels better. And so it is!

Abundance is Our Natural State

2009-10-17T11:28:00.000-07:00

When I remind myself to look for evidence of abundance, I see it all around me. There are an abundance of smiles, laughter, and even an abundance of leaves on the trees. If you spend any time at all on Facebook, it's easy to see that there are an abundance of opinions. Abundance is everywhere.

Recently when I was asked to do an exercise asking me to circulate abundance, however, I couldn't see it as well. I was asked to give a specific amount of money to people I don't know without concern for whether they deserved it or not. I was to know that the law of circulation was always in operation, so anything I am willing to circulate always returns to me tenfold. So why was it so difficult to randomly give the money away even though I see all around me that life is abundant?

I did some work in early August that I still haven't gotten paid for. What is owed to me is a significant amount. I wondered how I could afford to give money away when I am owed money.

I kept catching myself thinking in terms of worthiness. I kept thinking things like, "I should give this money as a tip to people who work at the cafe or find a really beat-up car and leave it there on the windshield because the owner of that kind of car is most likely to need it."

I realized that there is nothing that we have to do to be worthy of receiving in abundance. I see that giving and receiving are the same energetic; they are both part of the law of circulation. I am not giving to someone else because THERE IS NO ONE ELSE. There is only one life expressing in many different forms. So I will consciously circulate my good knowing that what I give multiplies and knowing that I can only keep what I give away.

Who Do YOU Think You Are?

2009-08-04T16:33:00.000-07:00

Recently I had the opportunity to attend an event and serve as a healer. While there was a lull in the action, another healer asked me to do a trade; I would facilitate a visioning session for him and he would balance my chakras (no, that isn't a euphemism). Since my healing ability is a newly-found talent, I was a little nervous. See, this healer I mention has been doing healings for a long time--over ten years. In fact, when I used to attend healing events, before I recognized my own ability to heal, he was always in attendance as a healer.

I thought to myself, "what can I possibly offer him? He has WAY more experience than I do." I recognized these thoughts as just another version of "who do you think you are?" Then I remembered that it isn't me that does the work. I am simply a vehicle through which God expresses. So it didn't really matter how much experience I have or don't have as long as I'm willing to put my ego aside and allow myself to be open and receptive. So I did the healing with that in mind and, more importantly, in consciousness. I was able to give him insight into his relationship with his brother and provide him with strategies that would help him improve that relationship. I was also able to interpret a dream he shared with me in a manner which gave him greater insight into some things he was contemplating. And, as it turned out, I didn't even have time to get a healing in return.

How often do we catch ourselves thinking we are too small, too inexperienced, too whatever for a task we want to accomplish? Our Higher Self or God or intuition knows how to do it even if we don't. Since we are God in expression, all we have to know is the 'what'. We have to ask the right questions. What am I being called to do? What is God's vision of my life? Then when we become open to those answers, we can allow Spirit to give us the ' how'.

Who do YOU think you are?

Stop Making Sense

2009-06-20T19:02:00.000-07:00

Today my right palm was tingling. I had my ideas of what this could signify (yes, I've been washing my hands frequently-thank you), but I thought I'd call a healer friend and ask her what she thought. At first she mentioned that it was a sign that I'd be getting a lot of money. She based this answer on the old wives' tale about itchy palms. Then she stated that the hands are the seat of creativity and that perhaps I was being called to express myself creatively. Although the former sounds great, the later most resonates.

Lately I've noticed that the decisions I've been called to make do not make any sense. Yet, creatively these decisions make all the sense in the world. In a few weeks I will be ending a part time job that I've had for three years which provided me with health benefits as well as financial rewards. Logic mind said to go out and find another job immediately. So I called a friend and solicited his help. I went for an interview, which went really well, and was pretty sure I would get offered the job. Something in me, however, knew that this wasn't the right move to make. So I stopped my participation in the interview process, much to my friend's disappointment. Although I do have some measure of sadness around disappointing my friend, I am clear that I must listen to my inner guidance, before all else, without worrying about who will be upset with me.

I'm participating in the visioning process to see what God's vision of my life truly is. This new vision may not include the kind of work I was previously doing or maybe it will. All I know is that I am clearly guided as to when to say yes and when to release an opportunity for someone else's highest good.

Recently I've discovered a gift for healing others. I use my intuition, prayer, visualization and I do what I am guided to do. I've healed migraines and other physical manifestations of pain using these tools. Recently someone witnessed a healing I performed and asked me where I'd studied Reiki. I haven't. I wasn't aware that the things that I was intuitively guided to do came from any specific healing modality. I just did what God told me to do. Sharing the gift of healing in this way did not make logical sense, but it worked nonetheless.

The more I listen to my intuition and allow myself to be guided, the stronger these gifts of healing become. The more I listen, the more I hear. So I think it's due time I stopped making sense. The logical mind is a beautiful and valuable tool when used in tandem with what I know to be true spiritually. Creativity defies logic and I am creating a new life for myself. I see that to fully express my creativity, I may need to stop making sense.

Excuse Me, You're Stepping on My Perception

2009-05-27T14:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I had an interesting experience. I am generally a peace-loving, conflict-avoiding person. But yesterday, I wanted to curse someone out!

My colleague and I met to conduct some business. I had parked in one hour parking as the business we were due to complete would not take very long. After we had been meeting for about forty five minutes, I told her that I would have to move my car or feed the meter so that I wouldn't get a ticket and that I would return to sign the second stack of paperwork as needed. She immediately became angry and asked me why I couldn't just sign the papers before I left. She said that she had to get going. I promised her that I would return quickly as I had other appointments that day as well, but she would not budge. Then she went into what I will describe as a rant, about how everything is done at my convenience and she is sick of it. After trying to reason with her and talk to her about how we've compromised in our work together all year, I shut my mouth, signed the stack of papers as quickly as I could, slid them across the table to her and ran to feed the meter as she mumbled an insincere, and slightly sarcastic, thank you.

As I left, I was very angry. I couldn't imagine why she would speak to me with such disrespect for absolutely no reason. I had to shut my mouth in that moment to prevent myself from saying something unprofessional in a professional space, but feeling that I had to be silent only increased my anger. I have been taught to respect my elders and this was an elder colleague. Yet, I did not feel in that moment that she deserved my respect, as she was not willing to give me hers. The icing on the cake was that when I returned from feeding the meter, she was still there socializing for at least twenty minutes! What happened to that appointment she was in a rush to get to?

As I contemplated the occurrence later, I realized that we had completely different perceptions of the same incident. I realized that while I saw myself as being compromising by moving my car and returning as quickly as I could so as not to inconvenience her or sacrifice her time, she saw me as doing everything at my convenience without giving thought to her needs. As I recounted all the times that I had made a conscientious effort to compromise with her, I realized that all of those attempts were completely inapparent from her perspective.

I saw that I ask for what I want in the professional setting and am unafraid of being met with resistance. I am also unattached to getting exactly what I ask for most of the time. I feel that if I ask for things and someone says no, I am back exactly where I began. I have lost nothing. My colleague does not see life that way and does not ask for what she desires; therefore, to her someone like me must seem selfish. How dare I ask for what I want?

How often do we look at someone else's behavior and find it inappropriate, without even trying to understand their perspective? Do I need to give my colleague permission to ask for what she wants so that she doesn't get to the point of being fed up and explode? Maybe, maybe not. Perhaps it's just my job to recognize that my perception of things is sometimes only true for me and to allow people their unique perceptions. It is also my responsibility to enlighten others as to how to best communicate with me. It is my responsibility to let them know that I highly value myself and I will only tolerate being spoken to with respect. Finally, it is my responsibility to define for them what respect looks like in my view. Excuse me, you're stepping on my perception.

Embracing a New Vision

2009-05-02T16:36:00.000-07:00

I am really clear about my roles in life. I know that I am a writer, a daughter, an educator, a speaker, a female, etc. Lately, however, I have stepped into a new role--healer.

It started with an invitation from a dear friend, a brother really, to serve as a healer at his birthday celebration. He is a gifted theta healer and his idea was to have healers from several different modalities provide their services, at a very nominal cost, so that all participants had the opportunity to be exposed to healing modalities they may not have tried before. He was calling it A Day of Wholeness. I'd been to similar gatherings before and was excited about sampling some things myself--massage, energy healing; yes to all. Yet, when he asked me to serve as one of the healers, that role didn't seem to fit me. Sure, I am great at visioning and my intuition is really strong. I've been able to share some important information with people that has helped them. I didn't think that I had enough control over the way the information came through me, however, to justify calling myself a healer. A healer was someone who was practiced and in control, right? So I said no. I told him I wasn't ready.

A few days later, I was on a bus headed to an event downtown. I heard very clearly, "tell him you will do it." I have learned to listen to my intuition, so I sent my brother a text saying that I'd do it. He was thrilled and grateful. I was happy that he was thrilled, but perplexed that I had been told to do it.

Lately I've realized that there are many roles I've had in life that I didn't expect beforehand. If someone had told me before it happened that I'd be on an archaeological dig someday, I would've said, "yeah, right." Yet, I've done that. When I was an English major in college, I swore I'd never be an English teacher. Yet, I've done that too-at the secondary level and university level.

I've learned that sometimes people see qualities in me that I may not recognize because these qualities are so ingrained in me that I cannot see them. They say a fish doesn't know water until you remove the fish from water, right?

So I'm now open to embracing several new roles in my life. International speaker? Yes! First soprano? Yes! Healer? Yes! I am willing, I am open, I embrace a new vision. And so IT IS!

All I Ever Needed to Know About the Law of Attraction I Learned From an Orange

2009-04-15T13:48:00.000-07:00

Last month I had a magnificent demonstration of the law of attraction at work. I wanted to attend the Prince concert so much, but it seemed as if every time I tried to get tickets, I came up empty-handed. Ticketmaster was a bust, joining the music club didn't yield a ticket, and although I aided others in securing tickets I couldn't seem to get one myself. My horoscope said that March 28, the day of the concerts, was supposed to be the luckiest day of the year for me but the circumstances I was seeing were not in accord with that. It was frustrating! I finally decided to accept what was occurring in that moment. I saw Prince in concert the month before, so I chose to surrender and dwell in gratitude for that phenomenal experience.

Prince was scheduled to perform three concerts at different venues at the Nokia Center. As luck would have it, the choir I sing with was also scheduled to perform in the plaza at the Nokia Center for Earth Hour. I imagined Prince crossing the plaza area between concerts, spotting our choir performing and joining us onstage. Hey, anything is possible.

As I prepared to sing I got a text from my cousin, who also sings in the choir. He had successfully purchased one ticket online and the confirmation he received indicated that there might be more than one ticket for him at the box office; although he had only purchased one. He promised that if he got to the box office and there was more than one ticket, he would give the extra ticket to me. Later, I got the text, "Two tickets! Hurry up!". There were two tickets at the box office. I grabbed an orange and my coat and ran from the Staples Center to the Nokia Center to join him at the theatre. I could not believe how lucky I was.

When we got to the entrance, I was told that I could not bring in my orange and that it would be thrown away if I left it with security. Hmm orange or Prince concert? Yep, the orange was left behind. Funny though. I hate to waste food. The wasted orange stayed in the back of my mind. Don't get me wrong, I appreciated and enjoyed the heck out of my free ticket to a Prince concert and I would never overlook that huge blessing!!!! However, I also decided that I was going to manifest an orange to replace the one I had to give up. I wanted to have my orange and eat it too! Okay, I'm a Capricorn and yes, stubbornness is part of my charm.

Two days later, I went to work. To my delight, someone had brought oranges to share. I got my orange back. After that it seemed that oranges followed me or preceded me everywhere I went. Free oranges started to show up at work every time I went there. There was even orange scented bathroom spray at a friend's house when I went to visit.

I got to thinking about the law of attraction and the principles The Secret luminaries shared in the movie. God or the Universe does not know any difference between manifesting an orange or a Prince ticket. I was seeing some things as being easy to manifest (oranges) and others as being difficult (Prince concert tickets). Yet, the Universe is always giving of Itself and responding to our vibrational frequencies. Whatever I desire is available to me as long as I am an energetic match to it. All I ever needed to know I learned from an orange.

Apply Gratitude Liberally

2009-04-09T19:07:00.000-07:00

I have done all that I can not to buy into the scarcity mindset that is the prevailing consciousness right now. I am praying, visioning, doing theta healing, giving talks to others and taking action from inspiration and not from fear. Today I discovered that there is one more spiritual tool at my disposal that I need to apply more often---gratitude.

Funny how you can learn an important lesson about your beliefs just by going to the mailbox. I was expecting two checks. One for a large amount (read pay the mortgage) and one for a smaller amount (read pay a light bill and buy some groceries). The check that arrived today happened to be the smaller amount. The first thought that entered my mind when I opened that check and looked at the amount was, "is that it?" Then I caught myself.

There was no gratitude or appreciation present for me in that moment. I was dwelling in unmet expectations. I desired a large check and did not get the check I was expecting. I looked at what I was focused on--lack. A lack of what I truly wanted; the large check.

In that instant, I made a decision to shift my focus to gratitude. I became grateful that I'd received a check. I have learned that this is where the proverbial rubber hits the road. I have learned that this is when I need to apply spiritual technology. Since I am aware that what I focus on expands, I choose to focus on gratitude. Apply gratitude liberally.

Staring Down a Squirrel Part II

2009-03-02T19:33:00.000-08:00

Last Tuesday I delivered a speech called, “Staring Down a Squirrel: How to Remain Positive and Productive During an Economic Downturn.” What God gave me to say was spectacular, inspiring, and awesome all around. Even though I didn’t have a microphone as promised and my Mac was not on speaking terms with the Powerpoint projector (don’t ask), I was able to deliver the talk with ease and grace. I felt inspired and from the feedback I received from the group, they felt inspired as well.

That Saturday, the day after payday, I no longer felt inspired because I started worrying about money. As I wrote out checks for bills, I started to recognize that the total amount of bills would certainly be greater than the total amount of money I’d received. I felt myself taking those shallow, worried breaths that fear inspires. Funny, how the Universe works. It seems as though as soon as I started worrying about money, the Universe started calling upon me to produce more abundance.

First, a friend called to ask me when I would be making the deposit for my bridesmaid dress. She is getting married this summer and is in full wedding planner mode. We had tried on the dresses a week prior and I didn’t have the cash to make a down payment at the time. The dresses could not be ordered until everyone turned in their deposit and I was holding up the process. Time to write that check.

Next, I got an email from my best friend. She sent me her itinerary for a trip I’d committed to in April for a former classmates’ wedding. I haven’t seen my best friend in four years. She lives in the Midwest, so we don’t see each other as often as I’d like. We talk on the phone several times per week, however, so I’m often more in touch with her than I am with friends who live here in LA. With the trip a little over a month away, it is time for me to start looking for airfare. I had cancelled a trip planned in January, so I thought I’d pay the one hundred and fifty dollar change fee and use that ticket. Unfortunately, since the wedding we are attending is Easter weekend, there were no more frequent flyer award tickets left. Instead of paying one hundred and fifty dollars, I ended up paying nearly three hundred dollars. Not in my budget, but I had committed.

Finally, I had the opportunity to attend a Prince concert that was a fundraiser. I could watch Prince perform every day and never get tired of seeing him. Was the one hundred and fifty dollar price of admission in my budget? Not. But hey, the fundraiser was for kids!

As I progressed through the weekend, more and more demands seemed to be made of me to circulate my resources. It became somewhat stressful. Then I started to remember that speech I gave last Tuesday. I started to actually listen to my own advice. I remembered the saying, “we teach what we most need to learn.” What did I teach my audience?

I told them that we stay positive and productive during an economic downturn by 1) dwelling in gratitude, 2) sharing and cooperating with others, and 3) thinking creatively.

Today, I started focusing on gratitude. I am grateful that when I went to drop off the payment for that bridesmaid’s gown, the woman in the shop next door gave me an envelope for free to put my check in because the bridal shop is closed on Mondays. I am grateful that I found a spa near my home that will accept the SpaFinder gift card I received for filling out a health survey in January. The gift card will cover both the fee for the service and the tip. I am grateful that I was able to go to the doctor today because I am so blessed to have health insurance through my part time job. Finally, I am grateful for the email that I received today with testimonials about abundance. How good it is to know that the Universe, God, sends me messages about abundance and circulation in so many different ways.

Next, I started thinking of how I can share. A spiritual principle I hear often is that we should give away that which we think we don’t have enough of. So if I don’t think I have enough resources, I should circulate more resources. Resources can include my time, my talents, and my treasure. Another principle I often hear is that if we want to prosper, we should prosper others. I thought of my brother, by another mother, Emmanuel. He has a new project he is working on and he sent me an email about it. What if I help his business to grow? I forwarded his flyer to several people I know that might be interested in the service he is providing. I have offered my home as a meeting place for some of his healing sessions so that he doesn’t have to pay for a workshop space.

Last, I started thinking more creatively. Where can money come from besides a job? Is there anything I can do to create more abundance in life? Instead of figuring it out mentally, knowing that I can’t solve a problem from the same mind or same level that created it, I took it into meditation. I was able to download the next steps that I should take to generate more opportunities for myself.

There is power in utilizing the spiritual tools we have at hand to remain positive, productive, and creative during what some of us are experiencing as a challenging time. Maybe instead of an economic downturn, we should be calling it a spiritual up-shift because this time is calling us to turn within so that we will never be without.

Being a Beneficial Presence

2009-01-26T13:14:00.000-08:00

This morning when I awoke, I prayed for God to speak through me. I prayed that I would be a beneficial presence today and I set my intention to be love wherever I went.

I was scheduled to speak at a community center in West Los Angeles at ten. When I arrived at about fifteen minutes before I was scheduled to speak, I met the activities director. She was a warm woman from Vienna and as we waited in the conference room for the attendees, we started talking. She was studying hypnotherapy, pursuing a master's degree online, and working full time. She spoke of how although she has lived here for eight years, living in Los Angeles was difficult to get used to. While seniors enjoyed breakfast in the next room, we talked about the importance of community and the difficulty some seniors face in creating one for themselves. We discovered that our birthdays are one day apart (mine January 17th and hers the 18th).

By ten a.m., I was certain that I would not have an audience to speak to--at least not the audience I expected. The activities director apologized to me and wondered why none of the seniors had shown up. She admitted that she had not done her usual advertising because she'd been absent due to a death in her family last week.

It became clear to me that she was my audience. She was the person to whom I was to be a beneficial presence. So I proceeded to share with her all that I'd intended to speak about for my talk. We talked about the importance of attitude and how our attitude creates our perception of events that occur in our lives. We talked about how we always have choice in the matter of our lives and how our resistance to what is creates pain and stress. We talked for half an hour before someone came in for the workshop.

She was a Russian immigrant who also volunteered at the center. I immediately noted that her blue sweater matched her eyes perfectly and thought she must have chosen that sweater for that very reason. The activities director left us alone to talk. I'd envisioned speaking to a room full of people and there I was having a one on one conversation.

At first, I tried to stick to my agenda. I'd planned to talk about using creativity to combat stress and I was going to do just that. We started doing an acting exercise that involved pantomime, but it became clear that this woman just wanted to talk. She wanted to talk about loneliness, low self-esteem, and the hardships that her family was facing. I was so honored that she trusted me enough to share these very personal feelings with me so quickly. She said that I had good energy. I tried not to "should" her to death. When I found myself about to give advice, instead I shared what I have learned. I pointed out to her what was admirable about her just from our brief meeting--her sense of style, her service to the community, her honesty. I shared my own struggles and my intention to focus on gratitude when I face situations that are not as I would like them to be. She said that I made her think about things in a way that she never would have before.

After our talk, she went to shake my hand and I asked if I could hug her. We shared a warm hug and it felt good. I said goodbye to the activities director and gave her a warm hug too. She walked me out to the parking lot and invited me to come to the farmer's market held there every Monday afternoon.

I learned that when I ask God to use me and I set an intention to be a beneficial presence and to be love, I can be of service in ways that I could not imagine or even intend. I went there to give service, to give a one hour talk about creativity and stress. I left with a full heart. That is being a beneficial presence. That is God in action.

The Power of Saying Yes

2009-01-11T11:33:00.000-08:00

For the past year I've been putting off buying a laptop. Sounds crazy, right? After all, I'm a writer! Writers need laptops! I just couldn't justify circulating money in that direction when other financial responsibilities had my attention. However, I finally got to the point where I realized that not circulating money toward something that could potentially inspire me to write more and bring me more abundant opportunities was almost like me getting in my own way.

Once I had this realization, I promised my mastermind group that I would buy a laptop by our January 12 meeting. Since I knew Mercury was going into retrograde on January 11, I figured I'd better do it soon. So on my deceased grandmother's birthday, January 7, I went to Best Buy. I "bit the bullet" and purchased a MacBook with eighteen months deferred billing, no interest, I was surprised that it felt good to circulate money that I didn't feel that I had, toward something that I intuitively and logically knew that I needed. I drove home happy and as I listened to the radio I wanted to dance.

When I got home, I got a call on my cell phone from an unknown number. When I listened to the message later, it was an organization offering me a speaking engagement. Later, I got a call from the car dealership where I leased my vehicle. They offered me five months of no payments on a new vehicle and they offered to waive all the fees associated with getting the new vehicle. It was unreal. I wondered, "could saying yes to the computer have opened up a portal to other things that I want to say yes to?"

According to Esther and Jerry Hicks and the teachings of Abraham, the universe holds things that we want in vibrational escrow until we are an energetic match to them. It is like putting items on layaway at a clothing store. We don't have the monetary energy in the moment, but we can place the things we want on hold until we get it. When our resources match our desires, we can pick up the items. When we are an energetic match to the things we desire, we can manifest them.

I realized that I have become a vibrational match to the things I desire by saying yes to the experience of owning a new laptop. It's such a simple thing on the surface, but such a profound thing on a spiritual level. Ernest Holmes, in This Thing Called You states, "Life may have given everything to you but only that which you accept is yours to use."

So right here and right now I am saying yes to being a success. I say yes to divine inspiration. I am a prosperous, inspirational international speaker, writer and teacher. And so it is!

The Dance of Life

2008-12-27T12:55:00.000-08:00

Last night I went to a good old-fashioned house party. You know, the kind where the front windows get all steamed up from the heat of the bodies pressed close together in the living room. I went to junior high with the dj, so as a contemporary of mine he played much old-school music. I danced the perm out of my hair!

At one point during the night, the dj said "some of you are going to be sore tomorrow." I laughed in acknowledgement of the fact that there may have been some people at the party who felt like they are getting older and can't move their bodies like they used to without paying for it the next day. I however, am proudly "youthing".

When I dance, I am out of time and space. My spirit is free and I feel sexy and happy. I don't think about what bills need to be paid or who hasn't behaved the way I would've liked them to. I dance the dance of life.

With 2009 rapidly approaching, I invite you to shed your notions of limitation. We are not too old, too fat, too thin, too broke, etc. We are spirit dancing the eternal dance. Party on.

God Jar

2008-12-04T11:35:00.000-08:00

This week I was asked to contribute to the creation of an altar representing release. I struggled with what to bring. Then I remembered a God jar I'd created. Two years ago, I was taking a spiritual course and learned about a ritual of using a jar to release any problems that I was facing to God. So I created a God jar, wrote all my problems on Post It notes and sealed them in the plastic jar. On top of the lid, I attached another Post It note which read something like, "These problems are being handled by God. My highest good is done now." I did not stop thinking about those problems right away; however, two years later I can honestly say that I do not remember the problems that seemed so overwhelming that I chose to give them to God by placing them in that jar. That is grace.

Have I been tempted to open the jar and take a peek? Yes! Of course! I even imagined that someday I'd add more worries to the jar at some point. Yet, somehow I've come to think of that jar as a sort of Pandora's box. I wonder if I open it, will all the problems I have to be revisited? So, for now, I will keep it closed and planted on a high shelf in my closet. It is a physical reminder of the grace of God. It is a reminder of the importance of truly releasing my concerns to a Higher Power and trusting that all is well in spite of any appearance to the contrary.

Today I went into a public restroom and was surprised that when I flipped the light switch the light came on and then went out almost immediately. I expected that when I activated that switch, the light would stay on. I have come to understand that I must trust in God the same way. Once I turn something over to God, I intend to do so with the same degree of faith that I had when I flipped that light switch. The difference is that God won't short circuit on me. God is the same now and forever. For this I am eternally grateful. And so It is.

Yes We Did!

2008-11-05T15:15:00.000-08:00

I now understand tears of joy. Barack Obama is the forty fourth president of the United States of America. I am dancing with my ancestors.

Slow Down, Don't Worry, Leave Something

2008-10-10T11:57:00.000-07:00

Ojai, California has many treasures: sunset and the pink moment over the Topa Topa Mountains, Meditation Mount, the Arcade, Bart's Books, and more. There is no treasure so great, however, as Finnish artist Otto Heino. When Pablo Picasso went looking for the greatest ceramic artists in the world, he found Otto.

At ninety four, Otto still works fifteen hour days and sleeps only four hours per night. This summer when I met Otto at his home and studio, he shared that he wakes every day at four. I couldn't help thinking of George Washington Carver, who awoke every day at four, went out into nature, and had a talk with God. I wondered if all creative souls got their inspiration at four in the morning.

Otto's bright eyes twinkled as he described clients who have flown in from Texas to purchase plates he created valued at twenty thousand dollars each. He smiled and his voice showed that even he is astounded that people pay so much money for a plate.

Otto's work is so valuable because it is beautiful and because he works without an apprentice even at ninety four. Everything displayed in his studio was made by his own hands. It's hard to imagine, yet true nonetheless, that the same hands that make these beautiful ceramic works of art also flew planes and dropped bombs in World War II.

Whenever we meet someone who has lived as long as Otto has we always want to know what the secret of a long, well-lived life really is. Otto's advice has three parts. First, he says to slow down. This advice is easy to take to heart when you consider that it took Otto ten years of experimentation to recreate a yellow Chinese ceramic glaze popular during the Chin Dynasty. Second, Otto says not to worry about things. A challenge, given the news reports of hard times in the economy and predictions of a recession. However, given Otto's long life and experience, we can learn from him that "this too shall pass". Finally, Otto says to leave something behind for your country. Otto speaks of legacy and of being a contribution. I took from this that we are not here to merely reap benefits for ourselves, but we must also be conscious of using our unique talents to somehow make the world a better place just because we were here.

When my friend Denise and I left Otto, I felt expanded and I could see the immense possibilities life has to offer if we slow down and are fully present to each moment. I smiled as I remembered that I almost didn't get to meet Otto because I'd wanted to take an aerobics class at the spa where we were staying. As I took an expanded breath, I thought, "slow down, don't worry, leave something."

Free Yourself

2008-09-17T14:26:00.000-07:00

As I looked up at the large video screens in Bovard Auditorium, I saw Archbishop Desmond TuTu dancing to the song that we were singing, "We Let It Be". I was on stage singing with the Agape International Choir and Archbishop Tutu was dancing in the aisle. The last time I'd seen him I was in college when he came to speak at Stanford University. I remember being inspired by him then and nearly twenty years later, I was still inspired by his simple presence of love and wisdom.

Before the performance, a few members of the choir had ventured onto the USC campus in search of sustenance. As we exited Bovard Auditorium, Archbishop Tutu was exiting his motorcade. He stopped and bowed to us and we bowed to him. That spiritual sustenance was given to us by him and when we sang, we sent it back to all within the sound of our voices and beyond.

The occasion of our performance was the Freedom Awards sponsored by Free the Slaves. This notable organization was created with the goal of freeing all enslaved people around the world. Our host for the evening, Director Tom Shadyac, provided us with a new definition of slavery. Loosely, he said that a slave was anyone who worked with no compensation, was threatened with violence, and did not have the option of leaving without threat of death. He reminded us that until all people of the world are free, we cannot truly call ourselves free. I was inspired by the award winners who do work to free children who are enslaved in the sex trade, who are forced to kill in war, and who labor as fisherman pulling ropes with bloody hands.

Toward the end of the awards show, the choir headed to another part of campus where we created a tunnel of love filled with song. When the award show audience arrived, we sang to them as they walked between the two lines we formed to create the tunnel. I hear someone say, "Wow", in amazement as he passed. Then Archbishop Tutu came through and he touched our hands with his as he passed smiling warmly.

This feeling of connection, love, and compassion is what freedom truly is. When we connect to that feeling tone, we free ourselves and others. Will you free yourself?

It Works if You Work It

2008-09-05T12:07:00.000-07:00

I closed my eyes and tried to tune in to where my card might be. I saw the drawer in my bedside table. I looked there, no luck. I looked in every drawer in my room, the kitchen, and even my closet with no luck. Then I remembered that I could communicate with God any time and ask for divine guidance. I remembered that there is a part of me which is God that knows full well exactly where my card was. After weeks of studying the teachings of Abraham Hicks, I was tuned in and feeling connected to God. I reached for an improved feeling, using my emotional guidance system, closed my eyes and said, "God, please help me find my library card."

The next day I went to the library to see if a book I had ordered was in yet. As I walked toward the entrance, passing the beautiful Japanese Garden out front, I started rehearsing my excuse in my head. For the past five months, I've been going to the library and telling them that I left my card at home by accident because I didn't want to pay to replace a library card that I knew was in my house SOMEWHERE. It was the principle of the thing. Since I know my card number by heart (yes, I am truly a library nerd), I had no trouble signing up to have books sent to my local library or using the library computers. The check out process was the only hitch.

So, once again, I found myself at the counter telling that story about forgetting my card. Only this time, the clerk looked at the computer screen and told me to wait just a second. He left me at the desk wondering if he were going to get the library card police. I just knew the jig was up. I was busted. No more "I left my card at home by accident" excuses. The clerk returned with a white legal envelope in hand. Inside was the library card that I'd torn up my house looking for.

Some might say that it was all a coincidence. I don't believe in coincidence. After all, it had been five months, but someone had realized that my library card was in the lost and found only the day after I asked God to help me find it.

A library card may seem like a small thing to some, but for me it represents much more. I love to read and to write. Historically, my ancestors were forbidden to do either, so for me the possession of a library card represents freedom. Thank you, God, for the return of my library card.

Learning spiritual principle intellectually is a good thing, but learning to apply spiritual principle in all areas of my life big and small is even better. It works if you work it and I am working it.

Innovation Part II - The Call Back

2008-08-20T13:38:00.001-07:00

"Is that what you're wearing?" The production assistant sporting low-rise jeans and a walkie talkie asked our group as we stood in line in the hot sun waiting for the call back auditions to begin. "Yes", we replied confidently. Then Angela, Sheila, and I shrugged our shoulders at one another in confusion. The previous day at the first audition, we were told to return for the call back wearing the same outfits.

As parents dropped off singing groups in mini vans, we stood in line surrounded by boy and girl bands wearing retro 80's gear. I smirked when I noted the boy band in front of us had vertical lines shaved into their eyebrows and were wearing graffiti t-shirts. I was actually around the first time this look was fashionable.

The Filipino boy band behind us harmonized to a Boys to Men tune for their warm-up. They were from Oakland, drinking designer coffee, and sounding good. Angela opened her umbrella to protect her fair skin from the sun, while Sheila and I ducked underneath to escape the heat.

Representatives from the cable network emerged from the studio toting cameras, a boom microphone, and an electronic bull horn. We were all instructed to sing the chorus of "Killing Me Softly" as one large group. One of the members of the shaved eyebrows boy band was asked to start us off on a key that would be suitable for all.

On cue, all the groups competing for a spot on the reality show sang in unison as the camera panned down the line. After the first take, we were told that our energy level was not quite as high as those auditioning in New York or Chicago, but we'd done okay. We were allowed to do two more takes. Our singing was to be spliced together with the New York and Chicago groups. Then we were told to yell with excitement and brag about our musical groups as the camera came down the line once more. Some of the boy bands took the opportunity to show off their dance moves. I even heard a few people yell, "Obama for your mama." I chose not to yell too much because we hadn't even had the singing audition yet.

Once inside, each group was photographed. In the lobby area, hip hop groups started to battle with their freestyle rhymes. The adrenaline was flowing. I tried to keep the the playfulness I'd felt the day before. I kept repeating the mantra that I was only there to help Angela with HER audition. But this was a call back and I felt some pressure to "step up."

Although we were told to be prepared to be there all day, we ended up being one of the first groups called. As we sat just outside the audition studio, Sheila, Angela, and I speculated as to whether being called early on was a good thing. We decided that it was. We said a prayer and did a last minute rehearsal. A production assistant came out and told us that when we went inside we were to pretend that we had never met the judges before. We weren't to refer to the previous day at all while we were on camera.

We walked into the audition studio in our line up order. The judges were once again friendly- no Simon Cowell in the bunch. They asked us how long we'd been a group and what we were going to sing. We answered as if they hadn't asked us those same questions the day before. We sang, "No One", by Alicia Keys. I remembered the judges' advice from the day before and I really "went for it". At the end of our song, the judges told us that we had the best energy of any of the groups, but unfortunately that was as far as we'd be going in the audition process. We thanked them and exited the studio. Surprisingly, part of me was relieved.

In the hallway, we were met by a camera. We were asked how we felt about not being selected. Off camera, the interviewer tried to egg us on and get us to say something negative, but we didn't play into his hands. We talked about how kind and complimentary the judges were and how much we enjoyed ourselves. Further down the hall, someone else who was auditioning asked us how we did and in spite of the fact that we didn't make it any further, we said in unison, "we did great!" And we meant it.

Part of me wondered briefly if the reality show people took one look at our identification cards and decided that we were too old. After all, not one member of our group had been dropped off in a mini van by our parents. Yet, another part of me was extremely proud. I measured my success by my willingness to do something risky and out of the ordinary. By my own definition, I was successful that day. Long live Innovation!

A Poem inspired by The Important Thing by Margaret Wise Brown

2008-08-13T16:16:00.000-07:00

The important thing about chocolate
Is that it tastes soooooo good!
It’s like heaven resting on your tongue
You can bite it
You can let it melt in your mouth
It isn’t sour
It is sweet
And it makes me happy.
But the important thing about chocolate is that it tastes soooooo good.

The important thing about music is that
You can dance to it.
You can’t sit still
But you can tap your feet
And wiggle your bottom
And move your head
But the important thing about music
Is that you can dance to it.

The important thing about family
Is that you can rely on them
You can laugh with them
And you can cry with them
And it’s fun to tell family stories
But the important thing about family
Is that you can rely on them.

Innovation Part I

2008-07-23T15:53:00.000-07:00

"Kim. What part do you sing in the choir?"

It was a simple question asked in the women's locker room of the gym on a Monday morning. Yet, somehow my intuition could feel an adventure brewing by the tone of Angela's voice when she said my name. A few seconds later, I had agreed to help her with a singing audition on Friday.

Wednesday, Angela, Sheila and I rehearsed for the audition. As we ended the rehearsal with string cheese and fruit as a snack, Sheila and I asked Angela to tell us more about the audition. That's when things took an interesting turn. We weren't just helping Angela with her audition, we were auditioning for a cable network reality show! And we were doing this after forming a trio two days before the audition and with only two hours of rehearsal. As we had no time, we decided to adopt the k.i.s.s. system--keep it simple sweetie. We planned to wear black bottoms and colorful tops on Friday.

When we arrived for the audition on Friday at Smashbox Studios, I held it in my mind that I was there to help Angela with her audition. Any other thought would have lead to "freak out" mode. Angela decided on the name Innovation for our group given the way we came together. As we moved through each stage of the audition, we began to enjoy the fact that none of the production assistants were getting the name right. We laughed as we imagined ourselves as an punk band when one production assistant asked, "so you guys are No Nation, right?"

After waiting, rehearsing, and having photos taken of our group, we were finally called in to see the judges. The judges asked how long we'd been a group. Angela responded by looking at her watch as I chimed in "three days." The judges looked incredulous, but we later found out that there was at least one other group who'd given the same response. Then we were asked if we had any choreography. That would be a no. But we swayed side to side in unison like a well-rehearsed gospel choir dressed in hot pink tops and black stretch pants.

The first song we sang was written by Angela. We got through one verse and one chorus before they stopped us. The we sang our second song, No One by Alicia Keys. The judges asked that we sing individually and since Angela had already sung lead, they wanted to hear Sheila and I sing. Sheila sang the chorus to No One, so I followed up by singing the chorus my way. I noted that the judges' eyes widened. We were told that they wanted us back the next day. We were advised to really go for it at the call back.

We left the audition room all smiles. We'd formed a group in a few days, put in a few hours of rehearsal, and got a call back for a reality show. Stepping out of the box was fun, yet I wondered if I could maintain a carefree attitude at the call back the next day. Would the reality of what I was doing set it? If I got a yes, how would it change my life?

The Power and Beauty of No

2008-07-02T19:14:00.000-07:00

Last year I was faced with a "say no situation". I was working full time, but my job was not being funded for the next year. I could choose to interview for a full time position in a context that didn't appeal to me or I could accept a part time job which required no interview and involved work I knew I'd love. In addition, the part time job was a step down from the position I had. I chose to accept the part time job.

My mom, who is the most supportive person in my world, questioned my decision. She didn't see the wisdom in trading a full time job for a part time one. "How will you pay your bills?", she asked. I'd asked myself the same question.

My intuition told me to take the part time job, but just to be sure I consulted my body as well. I sat in meditation, closed my eyes, and said aloud "I have accepted the full time job." I noted that my stomach juices started gurgling. Then I said,
"I have not accepted the full time job" and my stomach settled. My intuition and my body were in accord and I'd made a decision.

Saying no to that full time job obviously opened up time in my schedule. When another offer was presented, I was able to say yes and mean it. I took on consulting work through my own business Kimestry Arts Network, which in combination with the part time job, was more lucrative than the full time job.

There is power and beauty in saying no. Once we are clear about what we desire, saying no to things that are out of alignment with what we say we want lets the creative force in the universe know that we are serious! Saying no leaves space in our lives for what we do want rather than filling up space with what we don't want.

Last week I was offered additional teaching work this summer. I've been enjoying going to the gym during the day, enjoying the sunshine, having lunch with friends and teaching only two night per week. I said no to the offer and my stomach didn't lurch. There is power and beauty in saying no.

Staring Down a Squirrel

2008-06-12T13:01:00.000-07:00

"Squirrel, move! Move, Squirrel!"

I was out for a walk in the neighborhood. I have a gym membership, but sometimes I just like to walk outdoors and look at the trees, people, and dogs. As I walked down my block at a brisk pace, I happened upon a woman staring down a squirrel. The woman carried a drink cup from a fast food restaurant and was intent on going through a metal gate to enter a building complex. The problem was that there was a squirrel already perched on top of the metal gate, minding its own business, and enjoying a meal. The woman stared him down in frustration and kept repeating, "Move, squirrel." She could not continue on with her day, with her plans, until this squirrel got out of her way. She was stuck there, immobile, until the situation changed and she had no control over when or if that would happen.

I was reminded of how often I face situations and demand that they change before I can proceed. How many times have I "stared down a squirrel" in my life? How often have I insisted that a situation change, rather than looking at how I can change and accept what is? I know that acceptance does not mean that we agree with what is or even like it. Acceptance means that we do not resist the circumstance, thereby giving it more energy to expand. We simply take note of it and decide who we want to be in the face of the situation.

From now on when I am "staring down a squirrel", I will think of that woman and her stubbornness. I will laugh at myself for taking life so seriously. I will look at who I want to be in the situation and I will exert control over the only thing I can---my attitude.

Jury Duty-Induced Adult Onslaught ADD

2008-06-02T13:32:00.000-07:00

I heard computer keys clicking when fingernails typed on them. The woman next to me spoke exceedingly loudly on her cell phone as she made her power entertainment deals at 9am. "I can offer you five hundred per day", she told the person at the other end of the line. A man walked up to her and said, "Could you stop talking so loud? I'm trying to read. This isn't a phone booth." She replied, "This isn't a library either." As the gentleman walked away, she looked at me and asked, "am I really loud?" I nodded my head and grinned. She responded by speaking more softly.

No, this was not the library and not a phone booth; this was the jury assembly room. It was cold, boring and I felt as if I'd developed ADD within the first two hours of being there. I'd already read half of Barbara Walter's autobiography while laying on my back at the window wearing sunglasses to protect my eyes from the glare. My trusty jacked served as a pillow.

The public address system crackled annoyingly as the clerk prepared to announce the names of jurors who needed to report to a court room. I started reviewing in my mind all the advice I'd been given about jury duty. "Speak intelligently and they won't pick you." "Act normal. Don't go 'ghetto' on them. Be your usual self." My name having been excluded from the list of jurors called to the court room at eleven thirty, I decided that it was time to stretch. I danced in place and messaged my ears. Then I decided to actually fill out the suggestion cards provided in the assembly room. I suggested baked chips and fruit for the vending machines and free internet use for all potential jurors; twelve dollars and hour, hah! I decided not to put my name and address on the form. I didn't want any consequences and repercussions as a result of my 'sharing'.

The public address system cracked again and the clerk apologized again for the noise. We were dismissed for an hour and a half lunch break. I realized that this was actually longer than I get when I'm at work. I decided to go outside and eat my pre-packed lunch in the sunshine. The air-conditioning inside was giving my sinuses the blues. I rubbed sunblock on my skin and tried not to notice the cigarette smoke wafting my way from other jurors.

At one thirty lunch break was over. Back in the assembly room I alternated between reading Barbara Walters, writing, and reading spiritual material. The PA crackled again at 3pm. This time the clerk announced that we had served our time and were being dismissed. Several jurors cheered. No more jury duty for one full year.

As I collected my proof of jury service, I thought about the evening ahead. Daytime was all about jury duty; the night time, however, was all about seeing Sex and the City, wearing heels and sipping cocktails.

Funk On a Thursday Night

2008-05-23T11:08:00.000-07:00

I sat on top of a speaker at Zanzibar and felt the afro funke beats vibrate my legs as they swung freely. My friend Cat danced with vigor as the song transitioned into samba. A medium-built Latino male with an Elvis Presley hairdo approached me and leaned against the wall above where I was seated. We chatted and he asked me what I was drinking. I’d had a glass of wine with Cat earlier, but I was not planning to drink any more that night. Plus, Momma always told me to be careful about letting strangers buy me drinks, so I declined his generous offer.

Somehow, we got on the subject of hair. He told me that he was growing his hair out so that he could have it braided into corn rows. As Cat returned from the dance floor and sat next to me, he pulled out his phone to show us a picture of how he looked with corn rows. It looked much better than the Elvis Presley ‘do to say the least! Cat demurred as she pointed to the picture of Julio in corn rows, “you should wear your hear like that again.” Next thing I knew, Julio was asking if I braided hair. That would be a no; but I do salsa.

Julio and I danced to salsa, disco, and world music. It seemed that his upper body had taken dance lessons that his lower body hadn’t attended. His arms spun me around artfully as his legs tried to keep up. We both liked hip hop; only I was old school and he was new. He was Latin Brooklyn and I was Black LA and we were both cool with that.

At the end of the night, he asked if he could walk me to my car. He said he didn’t want to dance anymore if he couldn’t dance with me. That was sweet. Cat accompanied us talking about how wet her hair was from dancing in a sweatbox.

My best friend often asks me the question, "At one point are we too old to date twenty five year olds?" I guess the answer is "when you have a twenty five year old."

I Remember

2008-05-13T14:52:00.000-07:00

I remember singing lead on
"Walkin in the Rain With the One I love"
On stage with my friends
When I was four
I remember I only knew the chorus

I remember being five years old
and telling Mrs. Waters
That I was going to marry her son
I was only in kindergarten
But hey,
I thought she should know.

I remember wanting to love someone
Like Marcia loved Davy Jones.

I remember meeting my very first
Boyfriend
At a pajama party
The night I had my first car accident

I remember I was eighteen
and college bound.
He was dyslexic
And two grades behind me
And I loved him
More than Marcia loved
Davy Jones.

I remember seeing Prince in concert
For the very first time.
I remember a girl
Screaming uncontrollably
And realizing with Horror
That the sound was coming
From me.
I remember that I'd just turned eighteen
and had seen Purple Rain
About thirteen times.

I remember dancing to Prince tunes
at college parties in the suites
Until the walls sweated
And blue jean prints stained the paint.
I remember.

My One of a Kind Love Affair With The Spinners

2008-04-28T09:58:00.000-07:00

"I'll think about it."

For some people this means maybe, but for my cousin this means no. That is what she said when I invited her to go see the Spinners in concert. I asked a few more friends, but even my mother was not interested. Mom did however, give me a good lead on a potential concert companion--her older sister, my aunt.

I found out where my aunt's seats were and secured a seat right behind her. It seemed that as soon as I decided to see the concert, songs I rarely hear by the Spinners kept popping up on the radio all the time. "Could It Be I'm Falling in Love" and "Working My Way Back To You" took me back to summertime in the 70's when I was just a child enjoying a play date in my cousin's garage.

On concert night, I stood in the admittance line at El Camino College and spotted my Auntie B three parties ahead of me wearing an all-white jean outfit. Once inside, she spotted her ex-husband and his wife while I cruised down to row P to find my seat.

The lights dimmed as I chatted with the woman fortunate enough to be seated next to me while I was in full chatterbox mode. She was sixty eight and we agreed that we were fortunate to be seated near the aisle so we could get up and dance if the spirit moved us. After being "taken to church" during a moving rendition of "Sadie", when the Spinners sang "We're Having a Party", I got up into the aisle to dance. As I swayed in the aisle, Charles, the lead singer, came down from the stage into the audience and danced with women along the opposite aisle.

I left the concert dancing through the parking lot and singing the doo wops that accompanied the song "Rubber Band Man". I felt happy, light and full of positive energy. This is the soundtrack of my youth, in the movie that is my life and I am grateful!

It's All About Gratitude

2008-04-18T09:44:00.000-07:00

Recently I was at the supermarket waiting in line and the man in front of me received a ten dollars off coupon for his next shopping trip. The cashier reminded him to keep it in his wallet so that he wouldn't forget it. The man being offered the coupon recognized that he would not remember to bring the coupon, so he turned and handed it to me to use for my shopping order.

I was grateful and said thank you, but when the cashier asked if I wanted to return the favor and contribute one dollar to Easter Seals, I said "no, thank you.'

Later I reflected on that knee jerk response to saying no when asked to contribute something. It was an automatic response. I did not think about it. If I had thought about it, I would have realized that there was a spiritual principle in action right in that moment. I had an opportunity to give back exactly ten percent of what the universe had just given to me. One dollar given for ten dollars received as a gift.

The universe or God is always at work on our behalf and if we pay attention and notice spirit at work, we are given opportunities to participate in the law of circulation all the time.

Needless to say, I will be returning to the grocery store soon to take advantage of the opportunity to participate in the law of circulation more consciously and actively.

I Am the Yardstick

2008-03-25T09:09:00.000-07:00

I was enjoying a power walk by the beach on a sunny day. Listening to the ocean and feeling the sun on my face calmed me and made me feel connected. I noticed that as I approached the man walking in front of me, he increased his pace so that I could not pass him. This happened at least two more times; when I increased my pace, so did he. This man, who was bent over by age, seemed not to want me to get by him. The strand was wide enough that I could easily pass him if I wanted to, but I was not in a competitive space. I was walking for exercise and for peace of mind. So I decided to let the man walk just ahead of me and I did not attempt to pass him. He was going at a good clip anyway, so I thought he could be my pace setter.

When we approached a stairwell, he had to slow down and hold the railing so I ended up passing him. He said, "young, young, young. Do you realize you are fighting an eighty year old man?" I explained to him that I was not racing, I was just walking. He told me that he did not want me to pass him. He tried to do as much as he could at his age. I told him to walk ahead of me and I would walk behind him and not pass him. And I didn't.

After my hour of power walking was over, I walked down toward the water to listen to the ocean. It occurred to me that sometimes we can be a motivational tool for others even when we are not intending to be. We never know who is watching us and who we are inspiring. Sometimes, without intention, I am the yardstick.

Change the Bulb!

2008-03-19T14:21:00.000-07:00

The other day I was in my hallway looking through a box I'd placed near the front door. The light was already on, but it was dark. In an attempt to get more light, I flipped the light switch and turned the light off completely. I looked up and noted that all four bulbs on the lamp nearest me were burned out which left me with only the light from further down the hall to see by.

It struck me that there might be other times when I'm attempting to extract more light from a burned-out bulb. What thought forms (bulbs) might I need to replace in order to manifest my true desires(more light)?

The light switch on the wall was working. That energy source was available to me in that moment, but I could not access it because the consciousness with which I was operating was not in alignment with what I needed to create more light in my life.

In any area of your life where things that you desire are not showing up, change the consciousness with which you approach that challenge you are facing. Divine source or God is always available and ready to give us our desires. Change the bulb!

Miraculous Gratitude

2008-02-29T14:43:00.000-08:00

Recently I took a trip with a group of people on The Ocean of Gratitude Cruise. I focused on being grateful for all that I have and all that God has provided in terms of resources, people, and things.

What is miraculous about gratitude is that focusing on it puts all else in order. Before I left on the trip, I was worried about my financial dealings. I have a contract that I've been working since September that had not been approved and thus I wasn't receiving the pay that I should. While I was gone, rather than focusing on what I was worried about, I focused on what I was grateful for. Miraculously, the contract that has been on hold for months was approved. Things that were "stuck" got unstuck by focusing on what I want to expand rather than focusing on what wasn't going the way I thought it should in my life.

Take some time to be grateful for what you have. It may not be exactly what you want, but see the good in it. Like energies attract one another. Focusing on gratitude lets the universe know that you are willing to receive more to be grateful for.

Black History Moment

2008-02-04T11:01:00.001-08:00

What is the furthest you've ever walked? You missed the last bus or train so you had to walk two miles? Twelve? Imagine walking from Mississippi to California. Imagine doing so behind three hundred wagons, choking on dust all the way. Oh yes, and you're a slave.

This is the story of Biddy Mason, a woman who transformed her life from slave to landowner. Along the way, she fed the less fortunate and established the First African Methodist Episcopal Church of Los Angeles in her living room.

In the Bunker Hill area of downtown Los Angeles, there is a Biddy Mason Monument. It is nestled behind several stores and fast food restaurants, so you could easily miss it if you didn't know it was there. Much like the history of Blacks in Los Angeles, you have to desire to find it.

Saturday, I spent the day on a yellow school bus, not the short one, on the Black Heritage Tour sponsored by the Consolidated Realty Board of Los Angeles and Our Authors Study Club. Los Angeles is my birth place. I am one of the few, the proud, Los Angeles natives. So when given the opportunity to study my beloved city, I made the time for her, braving both bus fumes and car sickness.

It was a beautiful, clear day; so clear that you could see the Hollywood sign from Crenshaw Blvd. As I stepped off the bus at Olvera Street, I felt a flood of relief and inspiration. Okay, getting fresh air helped relieve the nauseau I experienced due to car sickness on the bus. However hearing about the Pobladores, the original forty four people sent from Mexico by Spain,provided inspiration. As I munched on an apple, which I carried in "the big purse", I learned about the twenty six Pobladores of African descent who helped establish Los Angeles as a pueblo. The Pobladores were a great example of what can be accomplished when African Americans and Latinos work together. In addition, the accompanying ambience created by a Peruvian flute player and the adjacent Museum of Chinese American History reminded me of the beautiful coexistence of cultures in my home town.

Back on the bus, I dug into "the big purse" again for a half turkey snadwich and carrots---yeah Trader Joe's. My cousin, who told me about the tour, broke out his jumbo bag of trail mix. As we headed toward historic Central Ave., our tour guide pointed out several buildings and homes designed by African American architect, Paul R. Williams. Williams was another amazing part of our history as he could not even enter many of the buildings he designed due to segregation.

On Central Avenue we passed the Dunbar Hotel where Black celebrities roamed in the thirties and forties. We then passed two landmarks that were not only part of Black history, but part of my personal history as well.

The Coca-Cola Bottling Company, famous for its luxury liner shaped architectural style, was significant for me because it is where my grandfather worked as a janitor many, many years ago. While the local junior high was historically significant because it was named after Black scientist Dr. George Washington Carver, it was personally significant to me because it is where my mother attended school.

I imagined my mother as a young teenager learning about the man her school was named after. I wondered what she thought when she learned how George Washington Carver, the former slave who became a noted scientist, woke up every day at 4am, went out into the woods and received his marching orders from God.

According to Glenn Clark, author of The Man Who Talks With Flowers, the way in which Dr. Carver got flowers, peanuts, and the sweet potato to reveal their secrets to him was by loving them profoundly. I can't help but wonder if my love for the City of Los Angeles will encourage it to reveal more of its historical secrets to me.

Feel The Feelings!

2008-01-23T09:50:00.000-08:00

According to the film The Secret, the Law of Attraction has three steps: ask, believe, and receive. The receiving step involves feeling the feelings of the things we want to attract into our lives.

On March 15, I will be holding a creative playshop,"Acting the Law of Attraction", to give you the opportunity to feel the feelings of what you want to attract through acting exercises and play. No prior acting experience is necessary.

Join me and make your New Year's intentions reality. For more information, click on 'view my complete profile' and send an email.

Go Kim, It's Your Birthday!

2008-01-18T12:20:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I celebrated my birthday. I am proud to share a birthday with Muhammad Ali, Jim Carrey, Eartha Kitt, and Ben Franklin. This year was a low-key celebration as it wasn't one of those big years--not 21, 30, 40 or 50. I enjoyed happy hour with some friends and consumed approximately my body weight in food, pina coladas and cake.

What I did see so powerfully is that I am blessed to have people around me who are willing to celebrate my life year after year. They show up, they call and sing, they email and they find ways to send their love. So in honor of my family and friends I'd just like to thank God for another year of life, of perfect health, of prosperity, and love.

May I grow more grateful and thankful with each passing moment. May I share my time, talents, and gifts with others. May I become more of myself as God every day and may I inspire others to do the same.

And so it is.

No Sex in the City-Let it Rain

2008-01-07T11:14:00.000-08:00

LA People do not go out when it rains. We think it will make us melt. We hibernate like bears until the water stops falling and then go to the store to stock up on food items whenever there is a break in the rain.

In spite of this, I decided to go to a surprise party for a friend, in the rain, over the weekend. As I was putting on my little black dress, my friend Alma called me to see if we were still going to the party. After all, it was raining. After I assured her that I would be picking her up at the appointed hour and that we would'nt melt, I grabbed my umbrella and headed out to pick up our other friend Penelope. She got into my car sporting a shower cap, an umbrella, and knee high boots. She was ready.

Once we scooped up Alma, we headed through several intersections, manned by traffic cops, as the wind and rain had caused the electricity to go out on several blocks. We pulled up to the valet and I was the only one not wearing knee-high boots, my nylon-clad feet immediately got soaked as I stepped into the huge puddle of water that had gathered at the curb. Inside, a security guard came to my rescue as I struggled to close my "on the verge of being completely useless" umbrella.

Upstairs in the private rooms, the dance floor was empty and many people stood watching a slide show featuring the birthday girl. Miniature frosted cupcakes decorated every surface in the four rooms, while the waiters cruised the crowd serving cheeseburger appetizers too large to eat daintily, beef satay, and vegetarian quesidillas. Then the partygoers received word that the birthday girl was minutes away and we were herded into the dance room to await her arrival. People closest to the entrance started shushing everyone and the sociable chatter died down; even so the occasional mischievous "shhhhh" could be heard amongst the crowd.

I stood on my toes so that I could see the grand entrance. The gues of honor was escorted in, eyes closed. She opened her eyes to shouts of "surprise!" and as she laughed in delight, the DJ turned up the volume of the music. The party was on!

Even so, many of the men in the room stood along the wall clutching drinks. I had a momentary flashback to secondary school dances back in the day. After group dances like the Cuban Shuffle and the Electric Slide and a few more drinks, people seemed to loosen up and the proverbial ice was broken. After an hour of working off my dinner and the one martini I had to drink, my girls and I rested as we shared an overstuffed chair.

A gentleman asked Alma to dance and left his suit jacket on the chair arm where she'd been seated. As they walked away, I noticed that the jacket was sliding onto the floor, so I reached across the chair from the opposite arm, to save the jacket from the dust it might collect once it hit the floor. Having done so, I righted myself on the chair arm, lost my balance, and slid off the arm and onto the floor on my behind cute black dress and all. BLAM! Fortunately, I got up quickly, and since the crowd had thinned out by then, without many people noticing my acrobatics. Penelope and I could not stop laughing, however.

As we drove home carefully through the power outage areas, we all chuckled intermittedly as we recalled my unchoreographed slide to the floor. With one unplanned action I had taken giant steps toward two of my New Year's Intentions--to move more and to laugh more. Let it rain!

Fly into 2008

2008-01-05T14:03:00.000-08:00

Have you set your new year's intentions or have you already broken your resolutions? Here's a poem by Rumi that reminds us all of limitless possibility.

Fly...

Why does the soul not fly
when it hears the call?

Why does a fish, gasping on land,
but near the water,
not move back into the sea?

What keeps us from joining the dance
the dust particles do?

Look at their subtle motions
in sunlight.

We are out of our cages
with our wings spread,
yet we do not lift off.

We keep collecting rocks and broken bits
of pottery like children
pretending they are merchants.

We should split the sack
of this culture
and stick our heads out.

Look around.
Leave your childhood.

Reach your right hand up
and take this book from this air.
You do know right from left, don't you?

A voice speaks to your clarity.
Move into the moment of your death.
Consider what you truly want.

Now call out commands yourself.
You are the king. Phrase your question,
and expect the grace of an answer.

~Rumi

No Resolutions, Just Intentions

2007-12-27T14:14:00.000-08:00

Now that we've made it through the holidays, many of us are looking toward the new year. Many of us will make resolutions for 2008; from losing weight, to saving money, to spending more time with family, we all have ideas about what we'd like to do better.

I've decided I won't make any resolutions this year. In today's society, resolutions have become synonymous with failure. If you looked up the denotative or literal meaning for resolution in the dictionary it would probably say something like "a pledge". If we had a connotative dictionary, or a dictionary that said what we really mean when we use words, the definition would probably say something like "a pledge one makes that one plans to break." Seriously, even businesses count on the fact that most people don't keep resolutions. New gym memberships skyrocket in January with all gyms seeing increased profits. By February most of those new members stop coming to the gym. All those resolutions to lose weight and stay in shape go out the window by February. So much for a new start.

I stopped making resolutions long ago for this very reason. Instead, I set intentions. Setting an intention, for me, is a spiritual process. My intentions are in alignment with who I have decided to be in life. I recognize that I am in a co-creative process with God in creating the life that I want to live. Anything I declare as an intention sets the law of attraction in motion.

I start by writing down all of my intentions. As I am a writer, putting intentions in writing is a powerful creative process. I pray over my intentions. I look for openings and opportunities that are in alignment with my intentions. I keep in mind that sometimes what I manifest, in alignment with my intentions, might look different than what I imagined. God's vision of my life is grander than my limited ego mind. So I am open and available to receiving "this or something better."

Finally I surrender to God, my Higher Self, my Higher Knowing. I keep my list of intentions in a sacred place and revisit them when the year is half over. I check off those things that I have accomplished so far and note those things that I have yet to manifest. At the end of the year, I list all of the things from my intentions list that I have manifested.

What is interesting every year is that there is a time period in which I forget some of my intentions. I am clear about the feeling tone I want to establish in my life, but I forget about the specifics for several months at a time because I have released them to God or my Higher Self. When I revisit my list at midyear, I am surprised that I have accomplished so much, so quickly. I give thanks that there is a process at work that is miraculous and beyond my limited thinking. Then I press on knowing that all is well and that the Universe or God is conspiring for my ultimate good.

This year let's resolve to release resolutions and surrender to our intentions!

Skip to It

2007-12-20T13:53:00.000-08:00

by Agnes Williams

Two days ago, I was watching my three year old granddaughter trying to skip. I have prided myself in teaching my nephews, nieces, two children, and my other three grandchildren in the art of skipping. I had the perfect skip technique.

Skipping is an art, and I enjoyed the hopping and rhythm of it. Skipping to me is just pure fun. So, in my mind I heard, "Keep up the tradition Agnes, show Maya the art of skipping". I didn't realize I hadn't skipped with a child in four years. So, I said to Maya, " Follow Grandmother", and to my utter surprise when I tried to skip my knees took a holiday.

My equilibrium was impacted with the loss of knee power, and I could not properly hop. I turned to my husband, and said "I lost my skip". Instead of feeling remorse, I laughed. Don't ask why that would be funny, but I thought, okay get a grip.

I have been quietly practicing ways to adjust so I can skip again. I believe when things don't work out for you or go wrong, you adjust. And if it stills doesn't work out for you, time to make some changes. So, I lost my skip perhaps permanently, and I figure I can point to others and request they teach Maya the art of skipping (of course I will be critiquing).

The world is abundant with many joyful things that can make us happy. All we have to do is be still and accept the abundance. I know there will be other fun things I can teach Maya.

I will mourn losing the ability to "skip". However, there is perhaps a win-win even if between the dash there could be a loss, you just have to remember to "skip" forward to the win and let go of what you can't do any longer to the possibilities of what you can do.

Visualization Versus Visioning Part III

2007-12-17T10:10:00.000-08:00

In part two of this three-part article, I talked about how to tell whether our visions come from ego or from God or Higher Mind. In this installation I'd like to explore the question, once we are clear about the source of our visions, what do we do with them?

As mentioned previously, sometimes our visions do not seem to make sense. We don't know what to do with them without further information. Once we receive a vision like this we have to wait for further instructions. Sometimes that further instruction can be a spontaneous inner prompting to take some action or to say something to someone.

Three years ago, I was talking on the phone with a woman who owned a business whose services I was interested in. Previously to this phone conversation, I had gotten the vision of doing acting and writing playshops on cruise ships, but I didn't know how to accomplish that. Although I was talking to the woman about something completely unrelated to my cruise ship idea, I felt a spontaneous inner prompting to ask her about speaking on cruise ships. At first I fought this idea, but I have learned to listen to my intuition. I told the woman what I wanted to do and she ended up providing me with the name of an entertainment company to contact that could help me achieve my vision.

We have to be open and available for God to speak to us many different ways. God is always speaking and we have to be open and available to receive answers through people, divine/inspired ideas, and serendipitous events.

During this holiday season, may you and yours express God's vision of your lives on a greater and greater level in every moment.

Visualization vs. Visioning Part II

2007-12-07T12:21:00.000-08:00

In part one of this two part post, I defined the difference between visualization and visioning. In this installment, I'd like to answer the question: how do we tell the difference between a real vision and wishful thinking?

In visioning we center ourselves and become still so that we can see, hear, smell, taste, and experience what God's vision is for our lives. When visioning, many practitioners become confused as to whether what they experience is truly God's vision or their own ego's desires. Here is how I tell the difference. When I see an image or a word that seems not to make sense and isn't something that I consciously have a desire for, I know that it comes from a deeper place within me. For example, during visioning back in August, I heard and saw the words Port Canaveral. At the time I did not know what the significance of that place was. I had never been there or had a desire to go there. I simply recorded what I heard in my journal. Recently, I received confirmation of a speaking engagement aboard a cruise ship. Can you guess where the ship will depart from? That's right, Port Canaveral.

Another way to tell that your vision comes from God is to vision for others that are not in your close circle of friends and family. I have had experiences of visioning for others and seeing things about them that I had no other way of knowing. In one instance, I saw someone playing a violin in an orchestra. When I revealed this to the person I was visioning for, he was shocked. He had not told me that he played the violin and had taken up the study of it again a year earlier.

Finally, once we recognize that we are one with God and that the mind of God is our mind, we can trust and know that we have access to God's vision for our lives. Since there is no separation between us and God, if we are truly doing our spiritual work, we can vision and receive visions with spiritual clarity and confidence. Our Higher Self or God Self has a much more expanded vision for our lives than our ego self. Once we align ourselves with this Higher Self, we know with confidence that our visions come from God and not ego.

In the next installment, I'll talk about what the next steps are after receiving a vision.

Visualization Versus Visioning

2007-11-30T12:10:00.000-08:00

Some people spent this past summer vacationing to tropical locales. Some worked straight through the summer and are working through fall just holding on until Christmas vacation.

I spent the summer taking a course called Visioning. No it's not what you think. I did not sit around for five weeks imagining all the material things I wanted. Instead, I spent five weeks learning to allow God to reveal to me His vision for my life. So much was revealed to me, that I enrolled in the course for an additional eight weeks this fall.

So what is the difference between visualization and visioning? Visualization is about putting your imprint or ideas of what you want into the Universe. Visioning is about allowing the Universe/God to put Its imprint on you. Visioning is an inspired process. It is much like being an overhead projector for God. You do not control the images or ideas that are placed in you, you simply receive them and then choose to live the vision.

How do we open up and allow God to use us like an overhead projector? First, you must become still. Center yourself in God recognizing your oneness with Her. Next, mentally begin to ask questions like, "what is God's vision for my life?" Then be open to receiving answers in the forms of smells, tastes, feelings, images, colors, words and sounds. Sometimes these messages or answers come during the visioning process and sometimes they come after. Try not to second guess the messages or visions. Know that you are one with God and that the visions come from Her. Finally, release the visions, give thanks, and record what you saw, felt, and heard.

I have been keeping a journal of my visions since August and have seen that some the visions have already manifested. In the next segment, I'll talk about how to tell the difference between a true vision and wishful thinking.

Spiritual Well Fare

2007-11-19T16:10:00.000-08:00

by Agnes

When I retired, I thought I would assist my grandchildren (sometimes) with their homework. It has been awhile since I had to deal with elementary school lessons. I knew I had forgotten a lot of basic things, but if you can find resources, you will be able to muddle through. Let's be clear, I make no claim to be smarter then a fifth grader.

Yesterday, my grandson had to look up the definitions of his vocabulary words and then write a sentence using the word. One of the words was "revolutionize". In reviewing his work, the sentence for revolutionize was, "I revolutionize my pants".

When I questioned him on that particular sentence with a gleam in his eye the response was, "Revolutionize means to make a change, and I do change my pants".

So, I ask you, how do you deal with that logic? Outsmarted by a fifth grader!!!

I begin to think, how do we revolutionize our way of thinking? How do we make sense out of nonsense? How do we revolutionize the chaos in our lives? And finally most importantly,how was I going to close the communication gap between what my grandson read as the meaning in order to help him write a better sentence?

To my grandson I replied, revolutionize is more then taking articles of clothing and replacing them. Revolutionize means turning away from the old to create something new or different. It is a form of letting go and moving forward.

Isn't it interesting that concept of words means different things to different people based on on an individuals perception?

As you think of the word "revolutionize", what will you do to refresh and/or change or will you just change your pants?

Peace and caring.

You Can't Keep What You Won't Give Away

2007-11-09T14:11:00.000-08:00

A few days ago, I woke up grateful for another day. Within seconds, however, gratitude turned into worry. I had been working a consulting job for two months and had not yet been paid. I had also been expecting another check for over a month that had not yet arrived. All that I could do on my end had been done. I had made the appropriate phone calls, "dotted my i's" and "crossed my t's". It was a "hurry up and wait" situation.

The facts were that I hadn't yet paid the mortgage, I had ten days until the grace period ended, and just a few dollars in savings. But what was the truth?

I decided that when I got out of bed, I would turn my attention to how I could help and be a resource for others. I had a colleague who had requested an article from me that she needed for a presentation. I decided to search for the article amongst the piles of paperwork in my den. I searched through file cabinets, egg crates, and binders looking for this one page article. Meanwhile, I found other material that I was able to put aside for other colleagues who had requested my help.

Finally, after two hours of searching, I found the one page article and faxed it to my colleague. Then it dawned on me. Not once during that two hours had I thought about my seeming financial challenges or what it appeared I didn't have. I had been focused instead on my resources and how I could be of service.

It wasn't about distracting myself. It was about choosing where to place my focus and attention in that moment. It was about being of service. So while the facts may not have been appearing the way I would have liked them to and had the capability of shifting from one moment to the next, the truth never changed.

I am made in the abundant image and likeness of God and I can only keep what I'm willing to give away. I am willing to give away my resources, my support, my service, and my time. I have all of these things in abundance and I am willing to give them away.

The next day I received a phone message. The check was in the mail. A new fact was introduced, but that did not change the truth.

No Sex in the City-What Ever Happened to Dating?

2007-11-05T13:14:00.000-08:00

Do you have a comment about dating? Let us know what you think!

Where I'm From

2007-10-31T15:35:00.000-07:00

I am from Pillsbury cupcakes, from t.v. dinners and "Boogie Fever". I am from birds of paradise, sloping front lawns, and a duplex filled with family. I am from gag gifts at Christmas and "the Murphy Look", from Charles and Mary and the Mitchells too.

I am from the creative and the strong. From "you'll be a clown when you're paid to be a clown" and "you're the only child I put on this earth!" I am from new thought and ancient wisdom. I'm from Los Angeles and Africa, smoked turkey and boxed
stuffing.

From the high school romance of my mother and father, their divorce and "but I love him!" I am from intelligent and beautiful women, loving uncles, and cousins more like siblings.

I am possibility in action. I am peace. I am a spiritual being ever learning, ever expanding, ever evolving. I am love.

Hold Your Breath

2007-10-23T10:10:00.001-07:00

I put an hour and fifteen minutes on the meter. Fifteen minutes for each quarter; cheaper than UCLA metered parking even though I was in Beverly Hills. I figured it should be plenty of time. My appointment was for three and it was only 2:37 pm.

In the waiting room I filled out the requisite forms listing known allergies and emergency contacts. As I filled out my forms, I heard at least two other people in the waiting room say that they had three o'clock appointments as well. This could be a bad sign. There were no clocks in the room. It was like waiting at the local Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) before customers could pay online.

At 3:30pm, I turned on my cell phone again, in spite of posted requests that cell phones should be turned off. I decided to go "feed the meter" as women in the waiting room shared the US magazines they'd brought with them in anticipation of the wait.

Upon my return, the woman who'd checked in just after me smiled my way as she exited the office. Her appointment time had been three also. I asked the receptionist if I'd be seen soon. At 4pm, my name was finally called along with one other woman. A third followed just after us as we changed in the dressing rooms. Both women were called into the xray room before I was. I was the last woman standing--so to speak.

When it was finally my turn, I had to explain to the technician that it was my first mammogram. She took two xrays of each breast as I held my torso in the most uncomfortable positions imaginable. I felt as if I was competing on America's Next Top Model and working with a famous fashion photographer.

Each time the machine clamped down on either side of my breast, the technician instructed, "hold your breath" from behind the safety glass in the corner of the room. I couldn't help but wonder why she needed a safety glass to protect her from what I was being exposed to without one. I asked, "how many times per day do you think you say, 'hold your breath'?" She chuckled. I did the math in my head. She says it four times per patient (two times per breast). She just saw three of us in five minutes. Four times three equals twelve. Twelve times every five minutes for at least eight hours per day if not more!

I put my clothes on and dropped my comment card at the reception desk on the way out. I wondered if there would ever come a day when a medical visit wouldn't feel like a long wait at the DMV. I smiled wryly as I heard the xray technician drone in my head, "hold your breath."

No Sex in the City is Coming, Folks! Stay Tuned!

2007-10-23T10:08:00.001-07:00

My stories will be podcasting very soon. I'm so excited!

Listening to That Inner Knowing

2007-10-16T14:06:00.000-07:00

How often have you had an inkling that you should do something or not do something? Have you ever got the feeling that you should talk to a specific person or approach someone you don't know? How often have you listened? I have learned the hard way how important it is to listen to that voice of intuition. I truly believe that it is the voice of God speaking to us. When I don't listen, I am always sorry.

Several years ago, I lived in a townhouse complex with an alley behind it. Every day I would drive down this alley to enter the subterranean garage and park my car. One day, my intuition told me not to drive down that alley. Since I'd lived at this location for three years and had driven that way every day, I didn't understand where this idea was coming from. I decided that it was a silly thought, drove down the alley, and parked my car without incident.

The next morning, I went into the garage and as I approached my car I noticed that I had a flat tire. This was what my intuition was trying to warn me of. I had run over a nail in the alley.

You would think I'd have learned my lesson long before that. As a teenager, I was riding as a passenger in a friend's car. When we approached an intersection, I asked her to stop the car, even though the light before us was green. I convinced my friend to do what I asked even though it didn't make logical sense. Sure enough, a car sped through a red light at the intersection. If we had kept going, it would have collided with us. My intuition saved our lives.

Today I listen to my intuition without hesitation; even if what it is saying does not make sense. Yesterday a co-worker of mine became very ill and was sick to her stomach. I was able to provide her with tea to calm her stomach down. I had the tea because that morning my intuition told me to include the tea as I packed my lunch for the day.

When we listen to our intuition, we listen to the voice of God speaking. Let intuition be a powerful tool for you.

Another Take on the Law of Attraction

2007-10-09T15:11:00.000-07:00

The movie, The Secret, has been very instrumental in sharing New Thought with a public that goes beyond those who attend New Thought Centers or churches. One of the spiritual principles shared in the film is the Law of Attraction. To briefly sum up this idea, we attract the situations, people, and material things which are in alignment with the energy with which we vibrate. If we vibrate positive energy, we attract positive situations. If we vibrate negative energy, we attract negative situations. This principle is radical in some minds because in essence it means that we are responsible for every situation in our lives. The thought is that we have drawn these situations in; our thoughts and feelings have attracted them.Consequently, if we want to attract positive people, situations, and things we have to draw them to us by holding positive feelings and thoughts.

While on a meditative walk the other day, I had the realization that in truth we don't attract or draw things to us, as much as we pull things out of us. If we begin with the spiritual principle that God has already given us all that we need by virtue of our birthright as children of God, then there is nothing that we need to draw in because all is already given. Author David Spangler, in his writings, describes manifestation as the transfer of energy from one form to another. If we recognize that we already have all that we need, then when things show up in form we are actually transforming energy that we already have, from the unseen world of faith to the visible world of effects. This is a powerful realization. This is spiritual principle actualized.

Falling into Jazz

2007-10-03T12:40:00.000-07:00

Most people ducked slightly as they walked in the front door because the band was set up right next to the entrance to the cafe. At Industry Jazz Cafe in Culver City, the newly-installed booths made the space seem to open up. I like to sit with my legs crossed, but my outstretched leg got in the way of the staff as they passed my seat at the bar. So I gave up that privilege so that the waitresses could more easily pass by to deliver hot plates of Ethiopian food and soul food staples like greens and macaroni and cheese to hungry patrons.

There was no space for dancing, but you wanted to; especially when that reggae-infused jazz jam was playing. We settled for bobbing our heads in our seats as Farzeed Farhati killed that alto saxophone during his solo. The music sounded so spontaneous and improvisational that Sandra pointed to the music stands and commented, "I'm surprised to see sheet music up there."

Almost everyone there was a friend of a band member, a local, or a friend of the guitarist, Chip Moyer who was enjoying a belated birthday celebration. What we all had in common was that we had come out on a Saturday night to support the Center for the Jazz Arts. During a short break, Guy DeFazio described the work of the center to promote the music and culture of jazz. The center created a film project for which they interviewed World War II veterans who told stories about their memories of jazz music during that time period.

The show ended at eleven pm, but patrons stayed to congratulate their musician friends on a job well done. The owner of the establishment greeted us and welcomed us to stay and socialize as the sounds of Motown songs like "Ball of Confusion" played in the background. At midnight we finished our meals and drinks and I left the spot with red wine warming my stomach and the sounds of jazz warming my heart.

Inner Resources

2007-09-24T12:08:00.000-07:00

Recently I began a course designed to deepen my spiritual practice and assist me in taking all of the spiritual truths that I know and actualize them. In other words, I'm learning about "walking the talk!". There are so many things that we know intellectually about God, Spirit, the Universe or however we refer to our higher power. Yet, once we realize these truths, how active are we in actualizing these truths---or "walking the talk?"

As I sat down to do my homework, this question was in the back of my mind. My task was to write down a list of the resources that are available to me. While I started out listing material resources, I quickly moved on to people. I saw how there are many people in my life who model success and abundance for me. Finally, I started to recognize my personality traits, strengths, and talents as resources as well. My sense of humor is a resource for me when faced with unexpected circumstances. My creativity is a resource for me when I am called upon to improvise. Love is a resource for me when faced with actions by others that challenge me.

I saw that my resources are vast. Then I had to question how well I take advantage of utilizing these resources to manifest my desires. To paraphrase the Bible, have I been seeking all that I want to find in life? I saw that I could do more and be more because God has already given me all that I need. My long list of resources was proof of that.

Today at work I was given the opportunity to immediately practice what I have learned. I was in a session with new graduate students and the person who was supposed to lead the session had a family emergency. I was the only one there to lead the session. I called upon my creative resources and taught the session with ease and grace. My inner resources were enough to save the day.

After Earthquakes, Hope for Indonesia

2007-09-19T15:34:00.000-07:00

A few days before earthquakes rocked Indonesia last week, an Indonesian luminary rocked the U.S. Anand Krishna, founder of two ashrams in Indonesia, shared his message of inter-faith tolerance at Soul Centered Metaphysical Book Store in Ojai, CA.

Krishna, as he prefers to be called, has been sharing his message in his native Indonesia since his miraculous recovery from leukemia in the early 90's.

Anand Krishna

What makes Krishna an amazing messenger is that he has been promoting interfaith tolerance in a country that is eighty percent Muslim. In certain areas of Indonesia, citizens are issued identification cards which list their religious affiliation. During actions known as "sweeps", citizens can be subject to death, if found in an area inhabited by the other religion, depending on whether those in charge of the sweeps are Muslim or Christian. These two religious factions take turns conducting the sweeps. Currently, Krishna and his colleagues are working to pass legislation banning the listing of religious affiliation on identification cards.

Krishna's purpose for visiting the US was to ask for the assistance of conscious citizens in preventing deforestation in Indonesia and the global warming that would result. American companies who currently do business in Indonesia are the largest contributors to deforestation. As thirty percent of the people living in Bali, Indonesia are foreign born, Krishna feels that a petition against illegal logging, signed by US citizens, will be heeded by the Indonesian government as well as the US government.

Concerns about global warming and the future of our planet are making the world a much smaller place. We are recognizing more and more the connection between all of life on earth. Circumstances are conspiring to assist us in understanding that what happens anywhere happens everywhere. In other words, what happens in Indonesia doesn't stay in Indonesia.

For more information please visit Anand Krishna

Meet Chef Lisa: She Can Bring Home The Bacon And Fry It Up In A Pan

2007-09-19T15:01:00.000-07:00

For more cool videos, check out 3 Brothers And A Sister

The Blogging Journey Of A Thousand Miles Begins With Me Being On The Back Of A Harley

2007-09-16T13:16:00.000-07:00

My First And Probably Only Motorcycle Diary

As the wind whipped water from my eyes and snot ran from my nose, I wondered if at forty I was too old for this impromptu motorcycle adventure.

I hadn't been on the back of a motorcycle since I was nine years old, but when Joe, my ex-boyfriend from college, invited me out for coffee I decided to do something different.

As I held on for dear life praying that he wouldn't go too fast and that my ancestors were protecting me, I wondered if I'd waited too long to go through a rebellious phase. What he didn't mention was that we'd be sharing time with a few friends.

When we arrived at Starbucks, the first thing I noticed was the DJ booth set up in front, orange extension cord snaking through the front door.

As the female DJ spun hip hop tunes bikers steadily roared into the strip mall parking lot, parked with their club members, and stood in line to order venti iced cinnamon dolce lates with extra carmel.

Many wore jackets representing their car clubs and emblazoned with their names and titles, if they were club officers.

Standing in the lot drinking green tea, Mr. Curve, a man with a goatee tied with a rubber band, asked Joe if I'd ridden with him on his bike.

As I listened to the two men discuss me without addressing me, I felt as if I were a teenager whose coolness factor was being measured. With a nod from Mr. Curve, I was in.

A single black and white police car rolled up and warned the bikers, via loudspeaker, that they had to keep the noise level down. The DJ temporarily turned down the music, only to increase the volume once the officer left the lot.

As the 80's tunes commenced, one of the bikers on the makeshift dance floor started bringing back 80's dances such as the wop, the fluke, and the skate. Joe started feeling the groove as well and as he got fully into his new jack swing, I offered to retrieve his karate kicks for him. Mr. Curve leaned over and whispered, "Stop him before he hurts himself."

A young Latina, fluent in African American dialect, invited me to stroll the lot with her. When a man approached asking for her phone number, she told him that she no longer dated men.

As he walked away resigned to the fact that he wasn't going to get her number, she confided in me that she'd recently begun telling men this bit of misinformation so they'd leave her alone.

By 11pm Joe and I had seen enough. He strapped on my helmet for me and we eased out of the parking lot slowly so as not to attract the attention of the police officers posted at every stop light.

This time I closed my eyes, held on tight, and let the wind caress my face. It was more Joe's world than mine, but at least at forty I was willing to do something outside of my normal box.

Next time, Joe wants to see Swan Lake at the ballet.

Welcome To My World

2007-09-16T12:56:00.001-07:00